A note to all my fellow men out there,

Stop pissing on the toilet seat. Take two friggin seconds to lift the damn thing up. If you're scared to touch the seat, go somewhere and find a urinal. Man I hate it when I have to go #2 and there are yellow droplets all over the place. I know you don't piss on your own seat so stop pissing on the public seats.

Please wash your friggin hands when you're done. I heard or read somewhere that 30% of men don't wash their hands after they use the bathroom. I think, from personal observation, the true number is closer to 45%. There should be an alarm over the men's room door that flashes in red neon every time a guy doesn't wash. Every time I shake another guys hand I wonder which side of the hygiene fence he sits. I guarantee a larger percentage of women wash their hands and they don't even touch themselves. Guys be warned. If I see you not washing your hands, I will go out of my way to let who ever you're with know that you didn't.